Three Ways to Stay in the Game

by Tim Austin

I use fishing as a means of escape. Baseball reminds me to engage. Let me explain.

I prefer fishing over baseball. Always have. Near my childhood home in Northern California, there was a creek full of smallmouth bass, bluegill, and the occasional trout. With fishing pole in hand and my Springer Spaniel off leash, a week hardly passed without going on several fishing expeditions. Never got tired of it.

Baseball, on the other hand, conjures up some unpleasant memories and feelings of regret.

I still have the marks of a jammed finger from little league practice, but that's the least of my boyhood woes.

I was 12 years old. It was Saturday and time to go fishing. It was also game day. My team was counting on me to be in the game. Should be a no-brainier, right? Go to the game. Fishing could wait. But the events of the previous week...I was trying to forget about it. Let’s just say fishing sounded a lot more appealing.

I had been begging my coach to let me pitch in a game. Finally, my moment of glory came. He took my tired and discouraged teammate out and put me in. I messed up royally. I don’t remember all the details of that day, but I know this: I left that field never wanting to return to the game.

The die was cast. I had decided that I was a fisherman. I preferred it over baseball. Still do.

So, the next Saturday found me wading in the creek when it was time to be in the game. The fish weren't biting, game time was approaching, and guilt was growing. I knew where I should be, but just couldn't face the discomfort.

To this day I wonder how my dad knew where to find me. I could have been anywhere on that creek, out of sight from the road. But I just happened to be on a stretch of water within his sight as he rounded the curve. Rolling down his window, he called me out of the creek and into the car. "You have a game to go to." he said. 

My change of clothes was in the back seat. I wriggled out of my sloppy wet fishing attire and into my sleek baseball uniform. The transformation was complete. We were on our way. I was back in the game.

I wish life could be as simple as this 12-year-old's decision between baseball and fishing. We all know it's not. But life is very much about staying in the game...

Having the courage to return to that difficult conversation with a family member or teammate. Returning to the field. Going back home. A potential career shift. A chaotic transition. Sometimes, just staying in the room takes all the determination we can muster. Each decision comes down to this: What does it look like to stay in the game?

In answer to that question, baseball is probably better suited than fishing. Here's why:

Baseball reminds me of where I should be. This is especially true when it come to showing up in our relationships. We all need our escapes, times of quiet and solitude. For me, fishing is a great way to do that. But when we use anything - hobbies or habits - as an escape in order to avoid the unpleasant, the "team" suffers. It's a short-term and self-serving approach which leaves us with regrets.

Baseball is a team effort.  Doing life, celebrating victories, and facing challenges together is part of God’s growth agenda for His children. Sure, life and relationships can be messy at times. Enough to make me wish I were back on the creek again. But looking back, I'd have it no other way. My life has been enriched and my family enlarged by staying engaged with the team.

Baseball is more like real life. We've all heard the phrase, No person is an island. Others on the team - family, friends and co-workers - are impacted negatively or positively based on your willingness to show up. We are interconnected, dependent upon one another. If I'm out fishing on game day, how will that impact the others? Like a lot of team sports, baseball teaches this and many other valuable real-life lessons.

“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.”
Hebrews 10:35-36 NIV

Those two verses from the writer of Hebrews speaks volumes to me of the long-term benefit of showing up, of staying in the game. I'd love to hear what staying in the game means for you. 

My son, by the way, is super athletic and excels at team sports. One of these days I might need to pull him out of a game to go fishing.  On second thought...

Perceived failure and regrets can cause us to shrink back and disengage. While certain forms of escape can be healthy, ongoing isolation is not. Working with a coach is a great way to get back in the game. Schedule a discovery call with me HERE.

Stay in the game when it comes to your marriage…We’ve created a special space just for couples. Check out our upcoming COUPLES RETREATS HERE.

Going Deeper

I do a type of fishing called downrigger fishing. Simply put, it’s a method of fishing from a boat which allows you to get your bait down deeper to where the fish are.

Downrigger weights are an expensive $40 a pop, the price you pay for going deep. If you lose one, there goes $40. When I started using a downrigger for fishing, I never imagined I would be paying $40 for a chunk of lead!

I’m used to going 20-30 feet deep to catch fish, albeit not very big fish. Recently, when I told a local fisherman about my desire to start fishing in Lake Tahoe, he explained that I would need to go down to 350 feet to catch fish, because that’s where the lunkers are. Then he went on to tell me about the squalls that come on lake, churning up waves of capsizing capability.

My reaction was discouragement at first. That kind of fishing would require all new equipment, not to mention much heavier (and more expensive) weights.  I began to work the numbers... all new equipment, including a bigger boat. Maybe I should wait until I win the lottery. Needless to say, I’m counting the cost of this potential new dive into the depths!

Thought: How much time, effort and expense am I willing to invest in order to get clarity and focus on what matters most?  I’m talking about something much weightier (no pun intended) than fishing.

In the Bible a good, young and wealthy man asked Jesus what he was lacking in his life, and what he should do about it.

“Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.” -Matthew  19:21

Jesus: Give it all up for the treasures of the Kingdom.

Young man: That makes me sad. I’ll catch you later Jesus.

My response: That’s a big ask Jesus, and thinking about it kind of makes me sad too. Can I keep my boat?

But if I sit with this response for a while longer I’m pretty sure I hear Jesus saying, “Knowing and embracing what really matters in this life is of paramount importance. Are you ready for me to take you on this journey of discovery?

The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. -Matthew 13:44

The fishing example and this story from the Bible got me thinking…

What’s really important, and why? How much am I willing to invest in order to answer that question with confidence and clarity?

We pay a price for going deep into values-based, purposeful living. Self-discovery and discernment take some hard work. But the investment is well worth it. Getting clarity on core values and prioritizing our lives around those values is like having a large enough boat which holds steady in the storm and won’t capsize when the squalls come up.

Once we do the deeper work of clarifying our values, we have a much better chance at leveraging the present by answering the question, What’s important now? This is the W.I.N. you can learn more about one of my recent posts here.

Are you ready to take the next step toward clarity? Download my free values clarification resource here

Want to take a deeper dive? Take the full assessment and book a coaching call with me to gain further clarity

Seamless Provision

The day after the Passover, that very day, they ate some of the produce of the land: unleavened bread and roasted grain. The manna stopped the day after they ate this food from the land; there was no longer any manna for the Israelites, but that year they ate the produce of Canaan. - Joshua 5:11-12

I notice something from this passage which seems to be true about most transition seasons. They are opportunities to trust God when resources we’ve come to depend on are no longer part of our lives. But trusting can be difficult to do when we can’t see the path forward or envision the ideal future we long for. Wilderness transitions are like that. We struggle to believe. We imagine worst case scenarios…

 What if my support dries up? What if I let go of this dependable paycheck so I can launch this dream, and God doesn’t come through? What if someone in my family experiences a health crisis while in the middle of this transition?

 Transition seasons challenge our ability to trust for daily provision, especially when the transition involves prolonged time in-between jobs and subsequent loss of income. I’ve worked with multiple clients who have struggled with trusting as they navigate this messy middle, having lost one dependable source of income while waiting for something else to replace it.

Manna represents God’s desire and ability to care for and sustain his children in wilderness seasons…miraculously. The Israelites experienced 40 years in the desert…a long season defined by the miraculous. Talk about prolonged transition! During this time, God provided a fresh, daily supply of manna (sort of like bread) from heaven to sustain them. There were other ways He provided as well. He caused the sandals on their feet to not wear out. He gave them water from a rock on more than one occasion. He led them through the desert by means of a pillar of cloud by day (shade and protection) and a pillar of fire by night to light their way (guidance).

 Finally, after a generation had passed, they crossed the Jordan river and were standing on the other side (think successful transition, phase 1). Suddenly the flow of manna stopped and seamlessly a new source of provision came through. Did I say seamlessly? Yes, God’s provision can be seamless in transition seasons when we understand the depth and breadth of his care.

 Here’s 3 things to know when it comes to experiencing seamless provision in times of transition…

• Seamless provision is not measured merely in monitary terms. As I look back on those in-between seasons of my life when money was scarce, I can truly thank God for the many other ways he seamlessly provided. He blessed my family with good health during times when a large dentist or medical bill would have been devastating. Unexpected gifts came from unexpected sources, causing me to thank God not only for the provision itself, but for the people through whom it came. He’s given me peace and courage to press on when I’ve been tempted to take the easy way out instead of staying on a more rewarding, albeit a more difficult path.

• Seamless provision doesn’t mean the absence of scarcity. Resources can become scarce when things are shifting. Previous wells dry up, requiring us to dig new ones. While traversing the desert, the Israelites did not feast on pots of meat every day like they did in Egypt. It was a lean and prolonged season. Lean because of the environment; prolonged, at least in part, due to their disobedience. Nonetheless, God met their needs through hostile places and uncertain times. He can do the same for us.

I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them. - Isaiah 42:16

• Seamless provision is actualized one step at a time. When the Israelites crossed the Jordan and ate their first meal from the produce of the promised land, they had no idea that the manna would not be waiting for them to gather outside their tents the next morning. It was a sudden shift in provision following a long journey, made possible by a step of faith in harmony with God’s mysterious and perfect plan. It was seamless as long as they kept moving forward, in step with God’s plan. They would soon face the next step of faith as they approached the walls of Jericho (Joshua 6).

 Transition is less about big leaps and more about a sequence of steps. It’s less about being a one-time event and more about process. - Tim Austin

 What do you need today to embrace and engage this transition season you’re in? What shift in perspective do you need in order to move through a transition of seamless provision?

 How can I help? Book a discovery call with me HERE.

 P.S.  Provision is waiting on the other side. Clarity is just around the corner.

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*Photo by Gabriela Palai from Pexels