The Well of Identity

Today, I’m thrilled to take you on a soul-stirring journey into the depths of identity. Identity has a huge role in the process of navigating change successfully and with greater clarity. Let’s find out why that is! Welcome to my latest podcast episode titled “The Well of Identity”, where we explore identity at its core.

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Episode Highlights

In this episode I share some practical strategies and insights to help us respond to identity confusion in our ever-changing lives. We will be reflecting on some ways we can stay grounded and purposeful in transition seasons.

Transitions are pivotal times to discover and embrace our true identities and live with greater purpose and fulfillment, even through the uncertainty and ambiguity of change. That’s good news!

Here are some key takeaways:

1. Healthy Identity. What does it look like? How does forgetfulness cause us to see ourselves as something less than how God sees us?

2. Identity Confusion: How can our true identities stay hidden under layers of unhealthy thought patterns influenced by our own misperceptions or cultural and societal norms?

3. Digging new wells: One of the invitations in transition seasons is to dig new wells toward our God-given identities. What does that mean and what might it look like?

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Listen to the Episode

Ready to dive into the well of identity? 🎧 Tune in to “The Well of Identity” on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Reflect, take notes, and let the wisdom seep into your soul.

Don’t Forget!

As you sip your metaphorical water from the well of identity, don’t be surprised when other “voices” of false identity invade the space. Breathe the prayer, “Lord, remind me who I am in You.”  This journey is an ongoing pilgrimage my friend.

Thank you for being part of this faith-filled community. 🚀✨

Warm regards,

-Tim

P.S. If this episode resonates with you, consider sharing it with fellow pilgrims on the path. Let’s create ripples of authenticity together!

Anchor Points

Transitions bring disruption and upheaval. In transition seasons we may come to a point where we no longer recognize our lives. The steadiness and stability we once knew seems distant and out of reach. We want to hold on through the winds and waves of change, but to what? What is there to cling to?

It’s easy to give up on the idea of maintaining structure and routine through transition seasons. What’s the use anyway? Constant change will just sabotage my efforts. And so, we let the current of transition take us where it will, with the hope that we won’t drift too far or, worse yet, drown in the process.

What if we could build some intentionality into the process of change? How could it help us stay more grounded, hopeful, and purposeful through the uncertainty of it all?

I’d like to share some insights I’ve gathered along the way, particularly as it relates to building structure and routine into these times of uncertainty. I’ll be referring to them as anchor points, but other useful language could be holds or non-negotiables.

WHAT ARE YOUR ANCHOR POINTS?

Anchor points can be anything we do to create a sense of stability in the messiness and uncertainty of change. They mostly center around rhythms of rest, routines and relationships. They are intentional ways we want to steward time and leverage opportunities for overall health and growth.

I see anchor points as non-negotiables, with the expectation that flexibility will be necessary while navigating transition. Imagine pulling up the anchor, rowing to another spot, then anchoring down once again. Our weekly date night gets disrupted. What other options do we have for quality time together? My morning quiet time needs to shift. No worries. Tomorrow is a new day. Actually, I have a one-hour window this evening. Win!

It’s usually better to tweak a non-negotiable than to give up on it altogether. Yes, God gives us do-overs, restarts and second chances. Do you see a grace principle at work here?

Having anchor points reminds us that we are not defined merely by the changes taking place. We are more than that. Even though transition can challenge one’s sense of identity and purpose, God can also use it to remind us of who we are in Him. That’s such a stabilizing force!

Anchor points play a critical role in building the muscle of resilience. It’s a balancing act for sure. We adapt and flex with the changes around us, even while staying committed to rhythms and routines which ground us. In this way, transition can take on its own unique cadence designed by God uniquely for us, for a season.

Here’s a few ways to establish anchor points in transition seasons…

• Focus on what you CAN do instead of what you can’t. Limitations are real in transition. Capacity can be lower, options more limited. But at the same time, it can be a very creative season, allowing us to explore and experiment with out-of-the-box ideas and practices, which in turn can become new anchor points, at least for a season.

• Reflect and re-anchor weekly, if not daily. Priorities tend to change more frequently in transition. Decision fatigue can set in. To remain grounded and focused on what matters most, it’s important to pause and re-order priorities prayerfully and regularly. I like to sit down weekly and ask myself a series of questions, something I call Reflection Point. Feel free to download these questions HERE and use them or some variation of them if you find it helpful.

• Focus on being, not just doing. This can be especially helpful when we find ourselves in prolonged holding patterns, with not a whole lot to do. Following 20 years of life overseas and facing a big transition, I faced an identity struggle. Who was I apart from the roles and titles that defined me all those years? By focusing on God’s invitation to be with him and to define myself in new ways based on my relationship to Him, I was able to let go of a false sense of identity and become more anchored in what really matters.

Do you have anchor points that have helped you navigate transition? I’d love to hear from you.

As you reflect on this post, what comes to mind? What are some ways you tend to drift in transition? What are some routines and rhythms that could help you stay anchored?

Looking for a transitions coach with a proven track record of helping his clients successfully navigate change? Schedule your discovery call HERE.

Pursuing Purpose, Prioritizing Relationship

“When can I meet with God?” was a cry of the sons of Korah in Psalm 42. I can guarantee the songwriter wasn’t looking at his watch when he penned those words. He was reflecting on the condition of his soul. How do you sustain the practice of meeting with God while trying to reach both personal and professional goals? The balance between your hopes and dreams and meeting with God is a delicate one. But one thing we know for sure: meeting with God is the source fruitful undertaking. Our life purpose is grounded in relationship. A healthy identity is rooted in it. Yet the struggle is very real.

My personal experience living and working cross-culturally has highlighted this…

My early years in Central Asia were heavy on the objective side. I thought I was fulfilling my purpose by doing things for God. My sense of identity was connected mostly to the work I was doing. My identity somewhat unraveled when I transitioned because the “assignment” was terminated. Or so I thought. Shortly after the transition, I searched for ways to replace the pursuit of purpose through other areas of focus, such as coaching, pastoring, podcasting, and writing. A perceived loss of identity motivated me to pursue and regain a “for God” posture instead of a “with God” posture, something author Skye Jethani talks about in his book With (a good read by the way). I slowly realized this approach is not sustainable.

It doesn’t lead to the abundant life God has saved me for.

Purposeful work is part of our callings, but certainly not the foundation. The bedrock is relationship, embodied in this cry:

“My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?” - Psalms‬

And so my prayer has become, “Lord may I prioritize meeting with You over and above my assignment for You.”

Skye continues to make his point…

“He (the Apostle Paul) understood that his calling (to be a messenger to the Gentiles) was not the same as his treasure (to be united with Christ). His communion with Christ rooted and preceded his work for him.”
– With, Reimagining the Way you Relate to God, Skye Jethani

Transitions have a way of messing with our sense of identity, purpose and calling. At the same time transition can be a wonderful opportunity to re-orient ourselves to what really matters. Working with a transitions coach can help you process and prioritize toward a successful transition.

Let’s have a conversation!

Book a call me

I leave you with The Message version of Psalm 42:1-3 and some reflection questions…

“A white-tailed deer drinks from the creek; I want to drink God, deep draughts of God. I’m thirsty for God-alive. I wonder, “Will I ever make it— arrive and drink in God’s presence?” I’m on a diet of tears— tears for breakfast, tears for supper. All day long people knock at my door, Pestering, “Where is this God of yours?””
- Psalms 42:1-3

For reflection:
Think of a time when you were extremely parched. How desperate did you feel for a drink? Have you ever felt that desperate for God? Describe the intense longing. Isaac was a well digger (Genesis 26). His survival depended on it wherever he went. If one dried up he dug another.

What are some wells which have dried up for you, and why?

How and where could you dig some new wells in this season of transition…wells that lend themselves to meeting with God?