Leaves and Lies

The City of Trees became Boise's nickname before it was even a city. As the story goes, after trekking through the desert along the Oregon Trail, French fur trappers came upon the Boise River Valley and shouted "Les Bois, Les Bois," or "the trees, the trees," in French. The name soon caught on.

As the cold weather now settles into Idaho, I’ve been surprised at the determination of the trees holding on to their leaves. Fall-colored leaves stubbornly cling to branches through freezing temps. Finally, with a few snowfalls now behind us, the trees are mostly bare.

A false sense of identity is kind of like those leaves. It can be difficult to shed and let go of. We can become so wrapped up in self-perceptions based on roles, titles, and what others think or say about us. We lose sight of who we truly are. The process of shedding the mask of false identity and embracing who we really are does not come easy. The lies we tell ourselves, and which shape our self-perceptions, can be stubborn. Kind of like those Fall leaves.

Dutch writer Henri Nouwen identified “three human lies” we believe about our identity—what he referred to as our False Self:

1. I am what I do.

2. I am what I have.

3. I am what other people say or think about me.

Which “lie” or combination of lies have you bought into? What would it look like to see yourself for who you really are?

The Advent season for me has become a sacred time to shed the false and embrace the true. What I’ve allowed to build up over time must be torn down, one true word from God at a time, until the weight of false identity is lifted and I’m free to live and work from an authentic place.

Eventually, old growth must give way for new. Christ came to make sure of that…

“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” - Isaiah 43:19

This season of the year is perfect for setting aside time to discern and discover the new things taking shape in our heads and hearts. As a way to get clarity, download my free Discernment Guide. Then, carve out some quiet space to sit with the questions. What’s the new you’re being invited into?

3D Transitions™ Group Coaching Coming Soon!

My newest offer is a 3-week group coaching journey called 3D Transitions™. Join me and discover and create a sustainable process to center life around what truly matters. If you would like to get really get on what’s next and have a plan to get there, this program is for you! Space is limited. Learn more and register HERE.

Expressions of Faith

In the world of life coaching, action steps are expressions of commitment to our goals. No coaching session should end without some kind of intentional action toward a stated goal. Coaching clients who do their homework and follow through reach higher levels of growth and success.

Our faith works the same way. It becomes useless and lifeless without expression.

Faith expressing itself in love, the apostle Paul says, is a clear sign that we are allowing God to rule our hearts. When I was younger, these expressions of faith were more life-altering because they were big decisions that would forever change the course of my life: going to college, choosing my life partner, landing on a career choice, moving my family overseas...

As I age and mature, however, I'm learning that the smaller, seemingly less significant choices have just as great, if not greater impact over time. And guess what? It takes more faith to live in obscurity, doing the right thing even when nobody around us notices. Smaller yet more consistent splashes maintain the ripple effect more than a big splash every once in a while.

Think about it. What do you want to accomplish? How can you reach your goal(s) through consistent and intentional choices? What kind of expression can you give to your faith today? 

 …the only thing that counts is faith expressing itself in love.

-Galatians 5:6

Soul-Care from the Cave

Read: I Samuel 22:1-2; Psalm 142 What does it look like to care for our own souls when hope feels like a distant memory? When what was promised is not delivered? David, forced to flee from a raging king, had made his temporary home in an abandoned cave. Bad news was imminent. Saul and his army were in hot pursuit, ready to take his life.

David was no stranger to caves. But this cave was more than a place of shelter for a tired shepherd boy. It was a place where he would learn resilience- how to relate to God in times of deep loss and confusion. How to steady his feet on God's promises and forge ahead with hope. Here are some ways we can learn, like David, to practice soul-care in the cave:

• Talk to God about your trouble. We can be brutally honest here. God is wise and sensitive, NOT fragile. He can handle our lists of complaints. I recently became extremely frustrated with a situation I was having to deal with. I was angry at others and God for not having solved my problems. In my frustration I said, "Leave me alone God!  Lay off!" Those words surprised me as they came out of my mouth.  I realized, however, that God was not shocked; he did not retreat. Those weren't the only words I said as I poured out my heart to Him. He heard every raw, gut-level complaint, and he loves me just the same. David said, "I pour out my complaint before him; I tell my trouble before him" (Psalm 142:2). We can tell God anything. He can't break and he won't run away.
• Know He Knows. We can be assured that God knows the exact place we're in and the trajectory we're on. He knows. From inside the cave, there is a lot we can't see, much we don't know. Our vision and perspective may be limited by things outside of our control. But rather than feeling forced into a corner by our limited understanding, we can choose to take advantage of the opportunities the cave gives to relate, reflect and regroup. There is a knowing which comes from this. We begin to say with David, "When my spirit faints within me, you know my way (Psalm 142:3). Yes, He certainly does.
• Give people the benefit of the doubt. People aren't always going to be in a position to help us. We come to seasons in life when nobody seems to understand or care. Those who try to help may give simple answers to complex questions. They just don't understand. This season in the cave is between us and God. That should release us from placing the burden of making it better on anyone else, and to accept them for who they are, not what they can or cannot do about our situation. David despaired, "there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul." (Psalm 142:4) Fortunately that's not true all of the time. Just sometimes, and often in the cave.

I love how David ends his psalm in hope:

Bring me out of prison, that I may give thanks to your name! The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me. - Psalm 142:7

I'm still learning the value of the cave, the treasures which God reserves for me when I'm willing to sit in the dark with Him for a season. How do you find ways to care for your soul in life's darker seasons? I'd love to add a few more strategies to my list.

Prayer: Jesus was sent into the wilderness (Matthew 4:1). David was forced into a cave. Whether I'm being sent to the hard places or feel forced into them by circumstances beyond my control, help me to know that You know my way. May I learn life-transforming lessons while walking with You in difficult times.

Image Source: http://all-free-download.com/free-photos/download/joseph_wright_art_artistic_218722.html